沒有考試-Emotion
兒子說模擬考的成績晚一點再給我看，我當下有些不高興，覺得自己只是關心，為什麼連問都像犯了錯。後來洗碗時想到，我每次拿到成績單，第一句都是問哪裡扣分，難怪他想晚一點面對。理解歸理解，心裡還是有一點委屈，好像在學校能安慰別人的孩子，回家卻只剩下讓自己孩子緊張的本事。晚餐後他主動拿水果給我，我原本準備好的那番道理忽然說不出口了。也許今天並沒有我想的那麼嚴重，他只是需要先把自己的失望整理一下。我很想立刻幫忙，又怕幫忙其實只是讓我自己安心。今晚先沒有再問，但我確實還惦記著。
sleeveen-Mind
Trying to put the right colour in the water of the new mat. Everything I choose is either too blue or too much like dishwater, which I admit the bight can manage perfectly well without my assistance. Looking at an old photograph didn't help because now I'm arguing with the photograph. I remember the day brighter. Perhaps it was brighter because of who was there, but I still want somebody from here to look at the mat and recognise the place. Put three strips of wool beside the frame and left them while I made tea. Came back and preferred the one I'd rejected first. Some expensive decision-making, this, measured in tea bags.
fitacrepe-Mind
Tô tentando separar o dinheiro do curso do dinheiro que fica disponível, porque quando está tudo na mesma conta qualquer valor parece que sobrou. Minha mãe sugeriu anotar cada entrada e cada saída, eu disse que já tenho a agenda, só que ela está cheia de horários e quase nada de dinheiro. Não precisa inventar outro sistema gigante pra abandonar depois. Posso começar pelo que entra na sexta e pelo que já tem destino, mercado, passagem, internet. A parte do curso sai da conta na mesma hora. Falando assim dá até vergonha de ter demorado tanto, mas quero ver numa semana com pouca diária, que é onde meu plano costuma virar conversa.
feuverifie-Mind
J'essaie de prévoir mes jours à terre et mon calendrier est déjà presque aussi serré qu'une rotation. Liège, Bruxelles, une démarche à Anvers, puis les affaires à préparer pour repartir. Sur le papier tout tient, à condition de ne jamais avoir envie de rester quelque part une heure de plus. C'est justement ce qui m'embête. La femme que je vois me reproche parfois de lui donner un créneau plutôt que du temps, et je comprends mieux la différence en regardant cette semaine. Je n'ai pas envie de tout laisser au hasard non plus. J'ai gardé une journée sans trajet. Pour l'instant je résiste assez mal à l'envie de savoir exactement ce qu'on y fera.
ranchdressing-Emotion
referee guy texted first and it was about a game, obviously, nobody is declaring anything in this thrilling documentary. still checked the name twice before opening it like another person might have the same number. i was happy in a stupid way and then annoyed at myself for being happy over twelve words, which seems like unnecessary extra work. told mom somebody had sent a funny clip and she said okay with a face that did not mean okay. replied without insulting the referee for once. now there's a normal conversation sitting on my phone and i keep rereading my own answer to see if it sounds normal. the goat has more social confidence and eats paper
守门员-Mind
英语老师让我们记方位，我一下就记住了左边右边，往球门两边一指就有了，可别的单词还是看着认识，合上书就没了。爸爸说你能记那么多球员，怎么这个记不住，那又不是一样的！球员在电视上跑，单词在本子上不动。我想给每个单词画个小动作，结果一个小人踢球画了半页，十分钟就记了俩，小的还非说我画的是鸭子。后来把卡片贴在门边，经过就念，妈妈端面进来比我念得还快。这个办法可能有用，也可能我只是记住了哪张贴在上面。明天把顺序换一下试试。选拔的事教练今天又提了，我倒没想多久，先把周五听写过了，免得英语老师又去找教练，说我脑子都长在球门上。
northpoint-Emotion
Mother asked whether I still did the little drawings for that young man in Bishop's Castle. I had taken her shopping, carried everything in, and was putting the frozen peas away when she said it. I explained, rather sharply, that they were my drawings and that I was an architect. She said she knew perfectly well what I was. This ought to have settled it. Instead I was cross all the way home, and cross again while unpacking my own shopping. I am sixty-three. It is an absurd age to be waiting for a particular sentence from one's mother, but apparently still within the permissible range.
صبر_جميل-Body
اليوم طولت قدام الماكينة باش نسالي تعديل قفطان لوحدة السيدة، وملي بغيت نوض حسيت ظهري مشدود وبقيت حانية حتى وقفت بشوية. كنقول غير نكمل هاد الجهة ونرتاح، ومن بعد كتبان ليا جهة أخرى خاصها الخدمة، حتى كيسبقني الوقت. ركابي حتى هما تقلو عليا فالدرج، شديت فالحايط وطلعت براحة وما عيطت لراجلـي حيث كان غادي يبدا يقول ليا خلي الخياطة. ما بغيتش نخليها، بغيت غير جسمي يعاونني بلا هاد الوقفة الطويلة كل مرة. من بعد ما تمددت شوية خف الظهر وقدرت نرجع نشوف الخدمة، ولكن ما جلستش نكملها. حطيت القفطان بعيد على عيني باش ما نرجعش نقول غير غرزة ونوض، الله يعطينا الصحة.
provisional-Mind
looked at permanent county jobs for a while and kept opening ones i already knew i didnt qualify for
very efficient way to say i looked without having to apply to anything
one office assistant posting actually fit most of what ive done, except the way they describe everything makes moving a box sound like managing international logistics
started writing down my actual tasks in normal words first
training new temps counts as something, probably
i keep thinking a permanent job means deciding what the next thirty years look like when really its deciding whether to send one application
still havent sent it, but the tab is open and theres a document now
very efficient way to say i looked without having to apply to anything
one office assistant posting actually fit most of what ive done, except the way they describe everything makes moving a box sound like managing international logistics
started writing down my actual tasks in normal words first
training new temps counts as something, probably
i keep thinking a permanent job means deciding what the next thirty years look like when really its deciding whether to send one application
still havent sent it, but the tab is open and theres a document now
دفتر_رسم-Mind
ضلّيت أتطلع على شبابيك البناية المقابلة للمقهى بدل ما أرسم الفكرة اللي طالعة عشانها. كل شباك معمول عليه تعديل صغير، حبل غسيل أو ستارة زيادة أو نبتة حاجبة نص الضوء، وأنا بعمل مشروعي كأنه الناس رح تسكنه وتحافظ على الصورة اللي براسي. حطيت ملاحظات جنب مخطط الفناء: وين رح ينشفوا الغسيل؟ ومين رح يسمع مين إذا الكل فاتح الشبابيك؟ صارت الفكرة أقل مرتبة بصرياً بس أقرب لبيت أعرفه. بعدين رجعت أتردد، لجنة المشروع ممكن تشوف هالتفاصيل صغيرة مقارنة بالشكل العام. أنا اللي بقول بدي أصمم مكان للعيش، وبنفس الوقت بدي اللوحة تطلع نظيفة وما يكون عليها غسيل. التناقض واضح ومزعج، ولسه مش لاقية حل حلو إله.